Whether being bi-polar has caused other psychological damage I don’t know, I just know that there is some.  Recently I Have come to realise that I am scared of being out of doors.  I used to be very aware of paranoia and panic setting in when I had to walk from my old house into town.  If I am doing things that are routine and I have done them for quite some time now, it is barely noticeable.  Ask me to do something I have not done before that involves being outside and I am a quivering wreck.  Afraid, paranoid and on the edge of panic attack.  It started at first as a reaction to a hot sunny day, insulin would play up, prickly heat, hypo’s and just a wound up feeling. Almost like I wanted to have a knife in my hand and hit out.

I wrote this quite some time ago and will update soon.